Worship is a lifestyle?
It is early morning and the alarm clock has just gone off…. For the third time after me chucking a shoe at it to hit the snooze button. I am groggy, not wanting to get out from underneath the warm covers. As I attempt to place my feet on the floor to get moving I swear to you I heard my pillow inviting me to just lay my head down for 5 more minutes.. I decline the tempting offer and instead make a bee line to the coffee machine.
I am normally the first one up and am a stickler for being on time. But this morning after a long, emotionally draining day the day before I am not in my usual bright eyed and bushy tailed self. I am downright…. Well… cranky and not wanting to do anything other than go back to bed.
I call up to the kids for them to wake up. Apparently the whole “want to stay in bed” thing was a full blown contagious epidemic in the Williams house this morning; because it was 10 minutes before they came slooooooooooooooowly down the stairs (bed head FULL on) to breakfast. Breakfast is poured into bowls as I am in no mood to “prepare” anything requiring culinary skills such as cracking an egg or hitting the “30 seconds plus” button on my microwave. I know, I know, I do too much…Julia Childs eat your heart out. Breakfast is being eaten at a pace that would make a sloth get annoyed and scream “Hurry UP!” I run as fast as I can (which this morning is more like a crawl) to the shower and in 5 minutes get ready for the day. I come back to find my children on the couch, still in their pajamas and not in any way shape or form motivated to do anything else. This is when my patience began to fray. “Get your school clothes on” came barking out of my mouth. I had not even taken a sip of my coffee that I had forgotten I had even made earlier. My kids are now just making a game out of the whole thing and getting goofy and, yes, getting dressed... but putting shoes on hands, pants on head, shirts on legs... you know, just being silly. I immediately turn into a drill sergeant and make them drop and give me 20... Ok, ok, not really but I did get snippy and tell them to hurry up. I then rush my daughter into the bathroom to brush her hair and then find a way to keep her bangs (which she wants to grow out) out of her face, since she can not locate her headband. Grrrrrrrrr. I am rapidly becoming a very grumpy mom. I then, after making my daughter cry from giving her a lecture on “proper care of her headband” try to cheer her up and apologize then bark at her to get in the car.
I am not very happy with myself at this point. I grab my cup of coffee and get the kids in the car and we start the drive. We are late. I HATE to be late. No, I LOATHE being late. I also am just feeling miserable. I have rushed around, made my daughter cry and single handedly made this morning a hot mess. I begin to pray. (In my head as not to disturb the skillet music I put on for there “Friday music” to school) I prayed something like this. God, what is wrong with me? Why am I being such a grump? Please help me to stop being such a rushed, stressed mom this morning. Help me to calm down. Amen.
I felt as if I had just taken a deep breath and let it out. There was this slight relief. I turned around and asked my daughter to forgive me for being so rushed and being so snippy. I then asked them if we could start over and just decide that even if we were tired and grumpy that we make the best of this day. It was amazing the change in all three of us. The ick lifted and we smiled.
I began to think of a question that get’s asked of me often...”what is worship to you?” I tend to answer something along the lines of “well, it is a lifestyle.” I will go a step further this morning... for a mom... like me... WORSHIP is a day like I had today and still having the ability to find joy and smile and give thanks in the midst of it. My prayer today is that I remember this and live this. I want my kids to know that Mommy is not perfect but she trusts and worships a GOD who is.
Hope this encourages you this morning... now off to drink that forgotten cup of coffee.
Heather
girl. if i were on my period, full tears coulda' gushed out...but for now there was a definate frog in the throat...good stuff. glad i read it. i'm not a mom but can relate...i love car prayers..sometimes i think it helps me to be most sincere/honest while driving...get it all out and unload to God...He speaks, changes my mind/attitude about stuff...and i can breathe. you're amazing!
ReplyDeleteAre you sure this is your life, and not mine? Cuz it hit a little too close to home. Thanks for your transparency. By the way, our Friday morning (or any day), get moving song has become "Beautiful Thing." Any idea on where I can find the lyrics...we're starting to make up funny words for the phrases we can't figure out. :)
ReplyDelete-Terese
I didn't even know you had a blog, but just came across it from fb! I guess I better start taking notes about mornings with the kids! :)
ReplyDeleteYou are so right about worship, and I'm glad that we don't have to be perfect, just forgiven! :)